Saturday, September 13, 2008

Depressing Post

I have good days and bad days here in ktown
Weekends are usually the worst. Im sitting here alone all day because Brad works every weekend and I have no car. I start to really miss home on these types of days. I know its selfish but my only really good friend I had is now pregnant and can't go out and drink or do anything really. And she never calls me because she always feels sick. Am I not fun to hang out with?? I dont know, I just find that no one here really calls ME.
Im near tears right now and I feel so stupid for it, the reason is stupid. I asked another friend yesterday if she was doing anything (drinking, going out) at night and she said she probably not, and then today I txted her and asked her if she wanted to do something tonight, assuming she had a boring night last night, she didnt txt me back but when I went on facebook her status said she was still drunk and that last night was so fun. It made a stabbing feeling in my stomach. It s not even her fault, who knows she was probably just to drunk to think of calling me or txting me.. but times like that makes me feel so alone. My friends at home would never do that too me. They call and txt me asking where I am if im like 30mins late anywhere and to hurry up and get there. lol.
I thought I was finally at a good place last week when school started. It was so great.. to bad it only lasted like 4 days... now im back to where I was in the Summer.

I need to stop wasting my time being depressed and feeling sorry for myself. I tend to do that too much =\ So I had my little moment and now I have to get on with my life, lol. Starting with a to do list. ...random comment but it sounds like a bird outside is either dying or having some kind of crazy bird sex....end random thought.
Stuff I want to get done:
- clean up and vacumn living room
- do the dishes in kitchen
- throw out old stuff in fridge

- change bedding/clean up bedroom
- clean office/guest room
- write out notes for all classes